A short time ago, mere days but feels like a lifetime ago, I found out I was expecting again. An unplanned, but immediately wanted and loved new little life. Vague plans were made, this new little person had people excited to meet him or her. Dreams of butterfly feet, wriggles and roles. Of a sweet little person, half of me and half of daddy, sleeping soundly and safely on my chest. Blue eyes or green. Boy or girl. Surrounded with love.
But life is cruel, and hope is the most wicked trick of all. Due to an under lying health condition and lack of planning, this little one was not given the best start, and before s/he had really had a chance, We were delt a crushing blow.
I lay here with my heart breaking at each contraction of my womb, as it works to part with a baby who should be nestled safely within its warmth. This organ fighting a battle with a tormented mother not ready to let go of this presious little one just yet. An internal battle she can never win but fights anyway.
Life is presious and for some much too short, but a person is a person, no matter how small 💔💔💔💔